PDX Urban Outdoorsman

The following story takes place in Salt Lake City many years ago.

If you are to believe the rantings of somebody I will call X-File I am an alien.  Not just any alien though, but one who is responsible for the deaths of his family and the take over of the human race.

For the longest time he has been telling me how aliens have ruined his life and how he is going to get even.  One day I decided to show him all the holes in his story and how it makes no sense. You see, X-File is the 4th Horseman of the Apocalypse yet what these aliens have done will keep him from doing what he must to finish their plans to dominate us lower lifeforms.  That is the point where he decided I was one of those who have dragged his life into the gutter.  If this should keep X-File from talking to me life has just become MUCH better.

The other thing that helped to make this week good was last night I decided to camp with a couple of hipppie kids I know and was informed I actually have a nickname I was not aware of among the other hippie kids. That name is “Old School”. Initially I was a little bothered because I thought  they were ranking on me because of my age.  It turns out “Old School” means I give respect to those who give me respect.  Among these people this is quite important seeing as most out here don’t understand the concept of respect let alone practice it in their daily lives. If you knew some of the nicknames people out here have been labeled with you would understand why I will wear this name as a badge of honor.

Here is hoping the rest of you have had a great week also.
Peace out!

Sincerely
Pdxurbanoutdoorsman.

Many people ask why I spend most time with a pair of headphones on and I tell them it is to block out the jerks that I have to deal with on a daily basis.  It’s either that or lose my voice from yelling at others to STFU.

No matter what services are offered, some of those receiving will find a reason to complain.  One day I was at Blanchet House for dinner and was listening to some moron complain about the meal that was being served.  This would not have bothered me so much except this guy was going through the line for his third serving.  Another time I was at Julia West House and had the joy of listening to some other scholar bitching about how they could do so much more because he knew there was more money to be spent on services.  I attempted to explain how things work in the real world as opposed to his little fantasy world with no luck at all.

When are some of these folks going to understand any service provided is a blessing?  It seems people believe the service providers owe them something for some damn reason. 

I truely believe the only reason some people are alive is because it’s illegal to kill them. Does this make me a bad person? If so I am more than willing to live with that.

Don't let this happen to you.

Could somebody please explain to me why some people need to push around a shopping cart piled with crap?  I carry a good weekender backpack that has more than enough room to hold my belongings.  I figure if I can not put it in or some how attatch it to this pack I don’t really need it.

Example:
There is this woman who seems to live at the library who keeps enough to fill not one, but two carts.  I made a point of watching one day while she was “sorting” through” her collection.  I saw what must have been nearly 50 pounds of magazines, all of which were ruined from having been soaked before.  She was also the proud owner of a chandelier, 4 door knobs, 7 umbrellas, a microwave oven without a door, and a meriad of other essentials.

By comparison this is one of the smaller collections I have seen.

I have made a request of friends which they have promised to carry out for me if need be.  If EVER they see me pushing all my wordly posessions in a shopping cart please kill me.  If this sentament makes me a bad person than so be it.